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When the Wolf Comes Home: Daddy, Jess, the boy, and the Monsters Within
Information:
- Goodreads: 4.60 out of 180 Ratings (ARC Copies being Review, Releases April 22nd, 2025)
- Age Category: Adult
- Series: None
- Genere: Horror
Summary:
No one will be spared when the wolf comes home.
Jess is not having a good night. She’s hanging out with her friend, Marjorie, when a guy comes out of the bathroom, clearly having some stomach issues. Majorie makes a deal: you clean the bathroom and then you can go home. And Jess hops on that opportunity. You know, she’s got an audition tomorrow, she’s gotta be ready. She hasn’t been having much luck in that department lately. Unfortunately, cleaning the bathroom goes to shit and she has to go to the hospital, but finds herself at home instead. Poor girl’s on autopilot. And her night gets even weirder when she finds a scared young boy, a naked man arguing with her neighbors, and a weird bear/wolf thing ripping into people. Now she’s on the run with a boy who gets weirder and weirder as times goes. And she still can’t get to the damn hospital.
Review:
I absolutely loved this. I was sobbing by the end of it, so points for getting so much emotion out of me. I love seeing an adult and a child try to bond during times of distress. I can’t explain it, it just does something for the child within me and the mother I am. It’s part of why I loved Mistborn so much. This book has such an interesting dynamic of a woman trying to protect and young boy and growing to care for him while also being terrified of him the entire time. This is a book about grief. About parents and how they fail even when they think they might be doing what’s best. It’s about a girl and boy who try to find some semblance of family while on the run from the government, police, and an angry father. Definitely a five star read.
“Daddy is roaring. Howling. Destroying everything in the house – furniture, pictures on the wall, all of it – while he searches for the boy.“
Nat Cassidy’s writing reads as so incredibly simple, yet can also have a profound impact. That sentence is how the book starts. “Daddy is roaring.” And, holy shit, is it a fantastic beginning. You know what you’re getting into on the first page. A young boy, 5 years old, is terrified of his Daddy. This is a hard read in that aspect and Nat Cassidy, thankfully, ensures that he has trigger warnings in the beginning of his books. Make sure you’re aware of the trigger warnings before reading – murder, gore, dismemberment, needle trauma, blood borne diseases, spiders, insects, suicidal ideations, grief, child trauma, alcoholism, parental death, child death, child trauma, and child endangerment. It is not a small book as far as triggers go. Nat Cassidy is wonderful at handling these topics with care and grace – as much as he can while being a horror novel. There’s no moment in this book that made me feel as if it shouldn’t have happened. There are definitely moments that shocked me. Moments that made me sad, cry, and uncomfortable. But never a moment that felt like it didn’t have its purpose or place.
“Hers was just found dead a little over a week ago, and she still has no goddamn idea how to feel about it. Fuckin dads ruin everything….And there’s Inner Jess, who see’s him everywhere. Who’s working overtime to force everything into the context of him. I wonder if Dad liked this cereal, too. I wonder what kind of music was he listening to lately? Did he put his socks on before or after his pants? Did he ever think about me?“
Spoilers – Death of a loved one who was also a source of trauma is complex and messy and I loved how Cassidy handled it. Grief is everywhere in this book (so is death, honestly). This is a book about death and fear. Particularly, how we can make our fears to be bigger than they truly are. The boy is afraid of his father. Why? His father was grieving and was angry and doing what he thought was best, yet still failing his son. The more the father got angry, the more afraid the boy became, resulting in the father being more mean and angry in this vicious cycle. At the end, the father can’t control it any more than the boy can and they’re stuck in this loop and grieving what they should’ve had, but can’t.
It’s interesting seeing who the real villain is within this story and realizing that no one is really at fault other than maybe the government and, honestly, when are they not at fault in some way? The boy can’t change the fact that he was born as he is. The father can’t control the boy’s fear. Yes, there are ways he could’ve handled him and things he could’ve done differently. But, ultimately, there is a time when every child is afraid of something, somewhere and their imaginations are limitless. Chaos would ensue regardless. The ending wrecked me because we finally had that moment when the boy realized his dad is just a man. And he was able to hug his father. His father was hugging him, they were both sobbing. It was a beautiful moment. And then, like other themes of the book, a parent does what they think is best that ends up hurting the child. How do you protect your child from itself? How do you protect your child from you? And how do you protect the world from your child? It’s rough. It’s heart breaking. And the story ends on that heartbreak.
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Romantic Redemption: A Grumpy x Sunshine in Well, Actually
Information:
- Goodreads: 4.13 out of 496 Ratings
- Age Category: Adult
- Series: None
- Genre: Romance
Summary:
You know those guys on TikTok that go on and on about how to please a woman and talk to women about red flags in other guys? Have you ever wondered if they always live up to their own ideals? Eva Kitt knows that Rylie Cooper doesn’t. Not only did he show all the red flags he goes over in his videos, he also ghosted her after having below average sex. Years later, Eva still harbors negative feelings about it. She’s miserable on her Sausage Talk show, where she blandly interviews celebrities in desperate need for clout while stuffing her face with hotdogs because, you know, male gaze and whatnot. She’s miserable and happens across one of Rylie’s videos and, naturally, decides to stitch and air out their years old dirty laundry. Rylie sees and cons her into some date that they can use as content to prove to her that he is a better person now.
Review:
Okay, it’s cute. I liked it. Eva is bitchy. She’s not nice. She’s not easy. She hates what she does because she wants to be a journalist, not interviewing people just as desperate as she is. Rylie is sweet. So sickly sweet, in fact, that it’s kind of hard to tell he’s supposed to be the same person Eva has such bad history with. Granted, that history is at least (or around) six years old. Of course he’s changed. And I love this dynamic. It’s grumpy x sunshine, but the guy is the sunshine and I ate that shit up. He tries to go big on their first date – too big. It’s a terrible date. But there’s something about him (and their contract) that makes him difficult to not be around. I loved their dates and their banter. I loved seeing Eva talk about how falling for someone so emotionally unavailable can stunt your own emotional availability. I wish we could’ve seen more dates because they were the highlight.
Eva doesn’t forgive super quick, but it also feels like she does. I’m pretty sure they’re supposed to do 6 dates and we only 3 before they’re officially a couple. They are awesome dates. There isn’t much of the book in which the two are apart. But I still wish we could’ve seen more of a slow burn. I wanted Mariana Zapata length books with this specific premise. Show me the time, the effort, the angst. I wanted to be kicking my feet and giggling the first time they held hands. I was giggling. But not kicking my feet.
But let’s talk about that therapy scene. That was it. That made the book worth it. Realistic? No. But emotional and then paired with a kiss in the rain and angst? Absolutely, yes, give me fourteen of em right now. I loved seeing Eva be called out for her own emotional unavailability and her habit of downplaying how much Rylie actually hurt her. Because let’s be honest – he did. She keeps saying it wasn’t a big deal, but it’s very clear it is if his face is still enough to piss her off 6 years later. If she still hasn’t been able to tell any partner that she loves them since then, it absolutely had an impact and she keeps denying that. And it’s unfair to be holding this grudge while refusing to acknowledge its a grudge at the same time that the person is trying to make up for it. And I loved her finally saying that it hurt.
But, Rylie is also weird. Sir. 6 years have passed. Yes, you’re a better person now. But, he’s claiming what he did to her makes him feel guilty and he’s always thought about it and always wished he could fix it. So, why not reach out? Why wait until Eva makes a video outing you before trying to reconcile? But, it’s a romance. In my opinion, it doesn’t have to make sense, it just has to be cute.
This book is super cute. Super fun. I do wish it could’ve been longer so that I could have more fun with it. But I love it as is, too.
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Finding Family Through Heartfelt Sci-Fi: The Bones Beneath My Skin
Information:
- Goodreads: 4.26 out of 7,704 Ratings
- Age Category: Adult
- Genre: Science Fiction, Fantasy
- Series: None
Summary:
Nate Cartwright’s parents are dead. His dad went home one day and decided to shoot his wife and himself, leaving Nate and his brother behind. Huge bummer, honestly. Except, they only gave Nate the cabin they’d found him in with his boyfriend and his father’s truck. He hasn’t even seen them since that fateful day, everyone in his family turning against him for who he loved. To make it worse, he’s been fired from his job. So, why not move to the cabin for a fresh start? Seems like a grand idea until his finds a man and his 10 year old daughter squatting in his cabin, pointing a gun at his head. And it’s from meeting these two that Nate finally finds his purpose in this world. That he finally knows and understands that he matters.
Review:
This book is so wholesome and heartfelt and emotional. The writing is quirky and fun. I could see a lot of people not liking it. It doesn’t read linearly – Nate’s thought process jumps between memories to the present. I liked it. I felt like it added to the quick pacing of the book while also allowing a deeper look into who Nate is.
The Bones Beneath My Skin markets itself as thriller sci-fi, but the thrilling aspect isn’t what you’d immediately think going into it. I haven’t read anything else by TJ Klune, so I can’t compare this to his other writing. I have heard a lot of people talk about his other books as if they’re relatively cozy, heart warming, emotional, and almost always found family. That’s exactly what this book is. You have a character whose family hated him for being gay. You have another character who tragically lost his family (his wife and son) and was delivered to a replacement child as an experiment. Then you have a young character who has never known what it is like to be human and is, unfortunately, learning the hard way. But it doesn’t seem all that hard when she’s surrounded by the love and awe of the two men who would do absolutely anything for her. And all wraps up in this beautiful found family aspect that makes me itch to read more of Klune’s work when I need something that is so sweet it almost gives you a toothache.
We didn’t come to save you. Only you can do that. We came to be your friend. To make you understand that, in the end, you are never alone.
I could see a lot of people not enjoying the pacing of this book. I could see them saying that there isn’t much of a thrilling aspect until the end – because there isn’t. But I think when you know the book is more focused on this little family than it is what’s going on around them, that will help the pacing and the irritation with the lack of anything genuinely thrilling. Sure, there are moments when Nate has a gun pointed at him by the guy he eventually falls in love with. And he isn’t sure in the beginning if Alex stole Art or not and was, rightfully, very confused and very worried for her safety. Then you have people shooting at them, but they get out relatively fine. And the chunk between that and the cult is big enough to maybe get bored. The action is paused for Nate and Alex to get closer, then Nate and Art to get closer. You see the men fall in love and share their backstories. You see as the men learn more about Art and just enjoy being around her.
It would make sense for some people to find that irritating, slow, or too mushy for what they were wanting. For me, it endeared me more to the book. Because even though I hadn’t read any of Klune’s work before, I knew that the emphasis is almost always on love, friendship, and finding a family when it feels like you have none. It was beautiful. It was funny in some places. It was heartbreaking in others. And it made me feel like I needed to cry during the end and I had to choke back tears because I was at work and couldn’t be caught reading on the clock. Honestly, this book was just wholesome and beautiful. Does it feel like something to reread and annotate? No, I wouldn’t say that. But it did feel like something that I think a lot of people could read right now and be made to feel seen and heard.
I definitely recommend this book. If you’d like it, you can find it here: https://amzn.to/42DF8pi This is an affiliate link, but there’s no pushing it. I definitely recommend seeing if it’s the book for you first. If you want something fast paced, setting your heart on edge, and is actually thrilling, this might not be what you’re looking for. But if what I described above seems to be what you’re looking for, give it a go! If you have read it, I would love to know what you thought. Does it hold up to his other work? And what book of his would you recommend I read next?
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The Inklings Digest 15
Currently Reading:
I’m currently reading We Kept Her In The Cellar by W.R. Gorman, which is a horror retelling of Cinderella. I’m about 10% through, so not a whole lot. I’m also 25% through The Bones Beneath My Skin by TJ Klune, following two gay men and a quirky girls while they face the world’s potential ending, and I am 15% through Blood Over Bright Haven by ML Wang, a standalone fantasy novel that a ton of people adore.
Recent Reads:
This past week, I finished Empire of Shadows by Jacquelyn Benson. I have a review up here you can find right here: https://theinklingspodcast.blog/2025/01/30/exploring-adventure-and-romance-empire-of-shadows-review/ It was phenomenal and I’m starting the second book at some point this week or next week.
The Blood Orchid by Kylie Lee Baker was a great book and I did have a good time. It’s the sequel to The Scarlet Alchemist, but reads more like a continuation than a sequel. It was tough to follow up Empire of Shadows with this and I could definitely tell than I just was not having as great a time with this one. It was still good. It’s quick and fast paced, but can also feel a lot like you’re just following these characters as they stumble around, trying their best.
I finished the week with The Lesser Devil by Christopher Ruocchio. I really enjoyed this. It starts around what would be roughly halfway through Empire of Silence, but with Crispin and his younger sister. It’s awesome seeing Crispin and how he thinks about Hadrian so often, because a lot of the thoughts he has about his brother are the same (or similar) to the ones Hadrian has about him. It was short and to the point, but still engaging and fun.
This Week’s Plans
Y’all, I don’t know. I want to finish my current reads and I do plan to have about 3-4 posts this week. Other than that, we’re just hanging out and reading to avoid reality.
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Exploring Adventure and Romance: Empire of Shadows Review
Information:
- Goodreads: 4.24 Out of 3,164 Ratings
- Age Category: Adult
- Genre: Fantasy, Historical Fiction
- Series: Raiders of the Arcana, Book 1
Summary:
Did you like The Mummy as a kid? Did you love the romance between Rick O’Connell and Evelyn O’Connell? Has a piece of your soul been begging for something somewhat similar to that since you watched for the very first time? Look no further, Jacquelyn Benson is on the same page. Ellie Mallory believes wholeheartedly in women’s rights. Unfortunately, the men do not agree. She gets arrested during a protest and is fired from her job because of it. But here’s the thing. Ellie is a well-read woman with a passion for exploration and adventure. She finds a map to a mysterious ancient city and decides, you know what? These turds don’t deserve this. So she just kind of takes it. And sets off to discover it on her own. And sure, there’s a guy hunting her down because he was looking for the city, too, and is definitely willing to kill over it. But that’s where good old Adam Bates comes in. Adam’s an American who also loves adventure. And when an attractive young woman quite literally falls into his lap with her wrists bound, he can’t pass up the opportunity to help her escape the man hunting her down and help her find this city – and protect the ancient and powerful artifact that could shake the world from the raiders.
Review:
First thing’s first, I loved The Mummy when I was a kid. Rick O’Connell was my first crush and his wife was the second. Everyone in that movie is obnoxiously attractive. Adam within this book is described as a rogue who is constantly messy because he’s always exploring and has blonde hair and blue eyes. We’ll forgive that character flaw – he looks like Rick in my mind and I will not be changing it. The characters in this book gave me exactly what I was looking for. Adam and Ellie are the dynamic duo who are cute and funny and really like each other but can’t admit it until a while later. That scene of Adam seeing Ellie in her underclothes just floating on the water with her hair fanned out behind her is a scene I need to see painted immediately because, for whatever reason, I think it so beautiful. Ellie is stubborn. She doesn’t trust men because she’s so scared of a man taking credit for something she’s doing or has done that it prevents her from being able to see that Adam is not that kind of man. Yes, he does protect in her moments. He is chivalrous in cases and is certain that they have to get married after this adventure so that her reputation and her family’s reputation isn’t ruined. All of that can be annoying, but none of that suggests he’s the kind of person she should be worried about. Yet, she still rips the map they desperately need in half and refuses to show him the second half, resulting in them taking the long way around. They aren’t perfect, but they do fit perfectly together and I love it. I would like to see more character development as we go through the series, but I think they’re development is going to be meant to be more similar to the character development people in a sitcom go through or maybe even the development of Stoker and Veronica in the Veronica Speedwell Series. I don’t know how many books will be in the Raiders of the Arcana, but I think there’s going to be a few, so it would make sense (to me) for there to be a slow process to their development. Still, even in this book, Ellie went from starting this journey with the certainty that she should keep everything to herself, no man is to be trusted, and everything she finds is a discovery she can share with Europe to beginning to trust in her friends and comrades and understand the sanctity of keeping these treasures with or around the people it originally came from. Not everything discovered has to be in the British Museum.
The villains in this book can be a bit mustache twirly. But, they still have a reason for their villainy – to gain power for the people they’re working for. While I do hope that they develop a bit more as well in the second, I don’t think this is the type of book what wants in depth character explorations – and that’s okay. This book give exactly what it promises. It’s an adventure with romance added in that has similar vibes to The Mummy. And it does a damn good job. You’re not going to get an in depth exploration of why this person thinks this thing or why this other person behaves this way. You’ll get mentions of colonization, how archeological finds should stay with its people instead of being shipped off to a people who can never relate to it on that level. You’ll get a woman trying to do things a woman simply can’t do without damaging her reputation – such as going on an adventure with a man, because oh no, what if they had sex while she’s unmarried – but you’ll get it in ways filled with flirtation, humor, and genuine care from the heart. It’s not going to lecture on these issues, it’s going to acknowledge them with respect. I’m a big advocate for allowing books to be what they are seeking to be. And this is not seeking to be top of the notch literature (in my opinion).
I loved the exploration. The artifacts and ancient city were so interesting to learn about and you can tell Jacquelyn knows what she’s talking about when it comes to archeology – at least to me, who doesn’t know a thing about it. The Mayan people have always been interesting to me, as well as the way they seemed to be so ahead of their time. I don’t read books about things like this often, but I adore them whenever I do. It’s fun. It’s exciting. Seeing Adam and Ellie grow closer while they’re trying not to fall over waterfalls or get shot or get eaten by giant bats is cute. I loved every single second.
If you’ve read this book or the next one, I would love to know your input on it. Do you think it compares to The Mummy? Did you get what you wanted from the book? Do love Adam and Ellie as much as I do? I had such a great time and cannot wait to get to the second in the series. Unfortunately, only 2 books are out currently, so I’ll have to wait on a third, whenever it gets released, if it does. I don’t actually know how many books are supposed to be in the series. I do know that this book fed something to me that I didn’t even know I was missing.
If you were interested in reading this book, you can find it at https://amzn.to/3EsK1r2 – I would love to know what you think! If you’ve already read the first one and would like to move on to the Tomb of the Sun King, you can that here:https://amzn.to/3PVyao7
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Empowerment and Trauma in Horror: A Review of Witchcraft for Wayward Girls by Grady Hendrix
Information:
- Goodreads: 4.18 out of 7,071 Ratings
- Genre: Horror
- Age Category: Adult
- Series: None
Summary:
Young girls getting pregnant is often viewed as the worst thing a girl could do. It reminds people that girls are people, too. Of course the boys who got them pregnant don’t suffer the consequences – it’s all the girls’ faults. They’re too loose. Too fast. Too grown for how young they are. It’s all their fault. So, they’re shipped off to St. Augustine, Florida, in a house specifically for unwed mothers – the worst thing a girl could ever be. We follow Fern as she gets to this house and meets other girls such as Rose, Zinnia, and Holly. Throughout the story, Fern and the other girls become desperate to gain any kind of power they can over their situations and their own bodies. And the to power may just be witchcraft – but power comes with a price.
Review:
I was nervous reading about girls seeking bodily autonomy when it’s written by a man, but Grady did a great job. His writing feels genuine and empathetic and comes across as angry about the situation as a lot of women are. This story feels heavy and made my chest feel tight at times. But, that’s a part of the story. These young girls, who’ve gotten pregnant and are suffering the consequences for no other reason than being an unwed mother and the fathers aren’t suffering any of the consequences, have their bodily autonomy stripped away from them. They aren’t even able to keep their babies. They have the illusion of the adoption process being their choice, but the people in authority quickly use any and every excuse to prevent them from keeping their babies. They’re treated as if they’re dirty criminals instead of young girls who made a mistake. Throughout the story, Hendrix focuses on the rage, trauma, injustice, and hopelessness of each character’s situation wonderfully. There are girls who willingly slept with their boyfriends, who had the promise of marriage, and girls who are too young and had no will power in it. You see as these girls band together to try and protect one another as best they can.
Honestly, you can see a lot of the themes of this story in our history books and in our present day time. Women still suffer the consequences to unwanted or unplanned pregnancies as if it doesn’t take two people to create a baby. You watch as these young girls are forced to make choices they’re too young to make alone. Yet, that’s exactly what they are – alone. There’s a labor scene in this book that felt visceral and I, quite honestly, forgot for a second that a privileged white man wrote that scene.
There isn’t enough witchcraft in this book for it to be in the title, but the story isn’t about witchcraft anyway. The real horror isn’t in the body horror the girls do to themselves or others, it’s about what these girls are forced to go through because of their choices – due to lack of education – all on their own. The body horror they inflict on themselves is nothing compared to the body horror they experience from birthing their children. They’re told over and over again that it’s painless and they’ll be perfectly fine and able to move on immediately after as if it never happened. But of course they can’t do that. Childbirth isn’t pristine and easy; it’s complicated and messy, and painful. Fern’s experience with childbirth is traumatic and she endures it just like everything else – alone. Holly’s childbirth experience is arguably more gruesome – but she has women around her, helping her through it. It’s interesting to see the difference between the two and how each experience impacted each girl.
I don’t think it necessarily does a great job at fully fleshing out each character or being a character driven story. You do get to see how different girls are impacted by these situations, but it doesn’t seek to fully explore them. This book seems more interested in what it’s trying to say rather than the people it’s exploring. It worked for me, but I could see some not really enjoying that aspect.
This book is a reminder that girls have always been oppressed and yet they have still always been powerful. This book shows what it looks and feels like to be ignored and dismissed. It’s gory and gruesome. It’s not super spooky supernatural wise, but definitely spooky in the real-life horror aspect. And I loved almost every single minute of it. I can see a lot of people not enjoying this book – particularly people who dislike stories about pregnancy or are currently pregnant. But, as a teen mom myself, this book made me feel seen during that point of my life. If you’ve read it, I would like to know what you thought about the book.
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The Inklings Digest 14
Currently Reading:
I am currently 12% into Empire of Shadows by Jacquelyn Benson. This is often compared to The Mummy, which I adored when I was younger. I’m enjoying it so far, but did have to restart when I was about 5% through because I was reading while a lot of talking was happening around me and I had no clue what had happened. I think I’ll also be starting Blood Over Bright Haven by ML Wang today.
Recent Reads:
I have read a lot since I last wrote a digest. I recently just finished The Blood Orchid which is the sequel to The Scarlet Alchemist. I really enjoyed it, but I think my excitement for the sequel had left a while before picking this one up. I also read Rest Stop by Nat Cassidy. Rest Stop is absolutely wild and I loved it. It’s gory and makes you cringe. I don’t even like Novella’s all that much, but I feel like this was the perfect length. Witchcraft for Wayward Girls was fantastic. Hendrix’s last book wasn’t my favorite, but he more than made up for it with this one. I love when men are just able to get it, ya know? And this book definitely feels like Grady Hendrix gets it. This about young girls who are pregnant and the whole world has turned its back on them due to their pregnancy. And they want to take a little power back.
I also read Empire of Silence by Christopher Ruocchio and Saving Noah by Lucinda Berry. Each of those has a full review here and each of them were damn near close to five stars. I’ve also gotten to try a few new authors this year so far and I don’t think there’s many that have disappointed me. For She is Wrath, The Forest Grimm, and Water Moon were all 2 stars. I didn’t hate them, but they did not give me what I was hoping for in the slightest. The Lark and The Wren was 2.5 stars. I dont think it was a bad book in the slightest. I actually loved Lackey’s writing, but the story didn’t feel compelling to me. I found that I could easily put it down and just not think about it again.
Week’s Plans
I don’t think I have too many plans this week. I’d like to have a review for Rest Stop and Witchcraft for Wayward Girls. I also want to have a discussed on bookish subscription boxes – why I have the ones I have and why I canceled the ones I’ve recently canceled. There are a few other reviews I’d like to get to this week, but they might be early next week. I’ve been playing with more creative titles and really enjoy that for the posts, I’m going to be continuing on with that. I’d like to finish Empire of Shadows and Blood Over Bright Haven this week. I do also have library loans out for The Lesser Devil and We Kept Her In The Cellar, just in case I finish those two early.
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Saving Noah: The Controversial Book About the Most Hated People in Society
Trigger Warnings: Sexual Assault, Suicidal Ideation, Suicide (Assisted), Abuse
Information:
- Goodreads: 3.93 out of 111,939 Ratings
- Age Range: Adult
- Genre: Thriller, Horror
- Series: None
Summary:
Lucinda Berry is a psychologist who writes intense psychological thrillers. Within this particular thriller, Berry writes about a mother and son duo who have an intense and troubled relationship. Before getting into into it too much, keep in mind the trigger warnings of molestation, suicidal ideation, self harm, and physical abuse.
Noah admits to his mother, Adrienne, that he has assaulted two young girls on the swim team he was coaching. By the time the book starts, Noah is coming out of the treatment program he was in, which served as his sentence. The idea is that most minors who do acts such as these do so for reasons other than being a predator. Maybe it’s to assert dominance, because they live in an overly sexual household, or many other reasons. If the therapy was used as it should, it could even be successful for these situations. But Noah endures shock therapy and abuse instead. Still, he’s coming out supposedly reformed. It’s time to begin anew, rebuild his life and his relationships with his family. Sure, his dad is disgusted by him, refuses to allow him to be alone with his young sister, and required his mother to have an apartment for her and Noah instead of staying at the home. But it’s nothing his mother can’t handle. The book is mostly through his Mother’s perspective, as she navigates the difficulties of loving her son and wanting to protect him while also hating him for what he did.
Review:
‘He gave me a half-hearted smile. “You’re right. I’ve got something worse. At least when you have cancer, people still love you.”‘
This book is a complex look into the psychology of both mother and son. It is not an easy read in the slightest. I start the book hating Noah’s mom. She came off as if she were attempting to excuse her son’s behaviors. This is something disgusting that, unfortunately, a lot of people do. We see the lines of He’s just a boy, he doesn’t know what he’s doing. He didn’t mean it. This shouldn’t ruin his whole life. And so on in nearly every case we see in the media. It’s gross and Berry does not shy away from this in her book. That being said, she somehow also writes these characters in way that you almost can’t help but feel sympathy for them. Noah’s mother did not ask for any of this to happen. She went from having a sweet boy who meant the world to her to everyone suddenly hating her for what he did – because there’s no way he did it without something being terrible at home, right? And even when a man (boy in this case) does something bad, the women in their life are still held accountable.
“and I clung to anything separating Noah from being a monster. He made a mistake. That was all. One mistake. We all made mistakes in adolescence.”
Noah comes home and he hates himself. He’s such a repulsive character and I was dead set on hating him for the entire book. And, while I certainly did hate him for what he’d done, seeing him as he works through this hatred for himself and as he desperately attempts suicide in order to prevent himself from hurting anyone ever again, I cried. I had never really stopped to consider that people like Noah are out there: people who hate themselves just as much as society hates them. This book makes the reader have conflicting emotions and asks really difficult questions. Could Noah ever be redeemed for what he’s done and who he is? It doesn’t appear so. I could see some people making the argument that this book makes light of Noah’s crimes, but it doesn’t read that way to me at all. Noah is unredeemable through this book – the ending (for me) confirms it. He is a menace to society, a real danger to children. Even though he hates himself for it and doesn’t want it to be that way, there is no way around that. He didn’t commit this act for any other reason than he is a pedophile and he was tempted. And let me tell you, reading Noah and his mother’s solution to this was heart breaking. Never in my life did I think I would cry over a pedophile dying, but here we are. It was heartbreaking that this was the lot given to Noah’s mother.
“It’s only a matter of time before my body responds. It rarely happens when I look at the first few pictures, but after a while it does. I can’t help myself. I have no control over it, and I hate myself for it.”
There are a lot of different ways to define a mother throughout this book. Adrienne begins the book desperately trying to negate the severity of what Noah’s done in order to find some semblance of stability and comfort in what her life is now. You see as she struggles with the fact that her son is a predator, so much so that she ignores the warnings of his therapist when she tries to bring up an issue with his release. She clings to believing that Noah’s reasoning for molesting those young girls is for some other reason, a mistake or misunderstanding. Yeah, what he did was awful, but at least it didn’t go further, right? Throughout the book, you watch as Adrienne slowly comes to terms with it. You see as she tries to hold onto this belief desperately, yet also is terrified to leave her daughter alone in the room with Noah. And then she learns that there is no other reason. Noah is a pedophile. He will have these thoughts and urges for his entire life. So, does she abandon him in disgust as a woman and mother of a young child? Or does she stick with her son and try to help him as best she can as his mother? At what point should a mother give up hope? As a mother myself, this is an interesting question that I hope I never have to answer.
Adrienne and Noah’s solution is for her to assist him in committing suicide after he’s made multiple attempts. At this point, Noah has been beaten at school, sexually assaulted with a baseball bat as revenge, attempted to overdose, and attempted to hang himself. He’s come to the conclusion that his family cannot move forward while he is alive. Young girls are at risk while he is alive. He adopts the view of Pedophilia as some sort of incurable cancer – do you wait for someone to endure it or do you assist them in ending their lives on their own terms without anyone else getting hurt? Adrienne makes the difficult decision that no mother should ever have to make – for the sake of her son and society, she’ll help him. Adrienne and Noah spend one last ‘normal’ day with their family. And then they go home and she holds her son as he takes his last breath. And it is absolutely gut wrenching to read. I was full on ugly crying.
“Death was intensely private, and I’d never felt so close to another human being as I did when I held him during his final minutes.”
This book is complex and emotional. It is not a book for everyone. I could easily see someone viewing this as Lucinda Berry making light of situations like these. However, that’s not how I read it. I read it as a therapist writing about someone society views as scum of the earth and the potential of that someone, despite being unredeemable and detestable, still being someone you can feel a smidge of sympathy for. Because I do. In this book, as in real life, two things can be true at the same time. I can hate Noah for what he did and agree that ending his life was the best course of action and I can feel sympathetic for the fact that he hates himself as much as I do.
The ‘mystery’ of this book isn’t the focal point of this book I don’t think. Which is a good thing, because it wasn’t great. I couldn’t have cared less. This felt more like Lucinda Berry had a conversation she wanted to start and used this as a way of starting it. There is no clear answer on Noah’s story. Some people might say he could’ve repressed the urges and used therapy and become a better person since there is a clear indication that that’s what he wants. He doesn’t want to be who he is, he wants to be a normal person. So if that’s what he wants, why couldn’t he use all the resources possible to become that person? Some other people might agree that ending his life was for the best. In this case, I’m on that end. And I don’t think anything you take away from this book is the wrong take because it is such a nuanced and complicated thing. It was an interesting read and I can’t wait to dive into more of her books.
I would love to know your thoughts if you’ve read this book! Did you feel sympathy for Adrienne or Noah? Do you feel like, with work and effort, he could’ve been redeemed or do you agree with the ending? Or, is there a 3rd option you’d agree with more?
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Hadrian Marlowe: The Whiny Hero of Empire of Silence
An In Depth Review of Book 1 of the Sun Eater Series
Information:
- Goodreads: 4.04 Out of 24,646 Ratings
- Age Range: Adult
- Genre: Science Fiction
- Series: The Sun Eater Series, Book 1
Summary:
Hadrian Marlowe is a spoiled rich kid who hates his dad and brother. He doesn’t want to have anything to do with the family business because it hurts people, but also doesn’t want his brother to inherit anything, either. Unfortunately for Hadrian, his dad prefers his goofy, no brained, boulder of a brother and plots to send Hadrian off to the religious sector to be a torturer – and if there is anyone Hadrian hates more than his family, it’s these religious zealots. He runs away from dear old pops, but his plans never go the way they’re supposed to and he ends up stranded on a planet he’s never been to before. 35 years later. He meets a bunch of neat people who all play a part in creating the man Hadrian becomes – the man who destroyed a sun. He, along with the readers, begins to learn more about these people and the mysterious Cielsin, beginning a journey he can’t stop himself from embarking on.
Review:
This is an interesting book. It definitely has its flaws, such as feeling maybe overly slow and the characters being frustrating, unlikable, or one note. Hadrian is a whiny rich kid who hates that he’s rich but also doesn’t want to not be rich. That doesn’t stop him from slumming it out with people for years due to being unable to make a single decision on his own. There is exactly one time in the book that this dramatic theater kid makes a choice all on his own that is only when his life is in danger – and even then, it’s still a decision he kind of had help in making. He’s annoying and insufferable, yet still somehow interesting and kept me curious through the whole book. I know, I can’t explain it either. The world is interesting with its complex cultures and views on family and the way it ended left me eager to see what happens next.
In Depth Review:
To get the negatives out of the way first, this whole first book reads as a 753 page long prologue. That’s not terrible and it genuinely kept my interest, but it felt like the story only really started near the ending. Hadrian, our main character, felt like someone the story happens to rather than the person the story is about. He begins the book lamenting about how his brother is all muscle and no brains with a proclivity of inflicting harm onto others and his father is a cold-hearted bastard. Hadrian builds himself up to be a person who is the opposite of these two, yet there is not a single moment within this book – aside from one at the very end – in which Hadrian takes the reins and becomes the master of his own story. Also, there are moments that Hadrian actually inflicts harm on others, despite hating how his father and brother did so. He makes promises that he knows he can’t keep in order to get his way, then both doesn’t get his way and can’t keep his promise. We spend nearly the whole book watching as he toils between decisions and waits so long to make one that it ends up being the only real option left. There are many times when he makes the excuse of doing something bad (such as partaking in the torture of a Cielsion) that there just wasn’t any other option left. But, if he would sit and actually think some things through, this reasoning just isn’t true. That makes him a character that can be irritating to read about, yet he is also charismatic enough that his choices and behaviors making him interesting and keep the reader curious enough to continue. The side characters definitely help to make this possible. Hadrian is a fun person to see in contrast to Valka, who is mysterious and aloof and intelligent – all things I think Hadrian wishes he was. Marius reminds him of his father by making mean decisions, but he makes them in a way Hadrian feels he can begrudgingly respect. Anias is just there, like her brother, but has a calculating aura. But, even though the other characters help add to the interest of who Hadrian is and help him keep the story going, there isn’t a single one of them that actually feels like a person. They all solely exist for Hadrian, they aren’t their own people. Valka and Marius (I really hope that’s his name) come close, but I don’t think they’re fully realized yet. We’re introduced to a ton of people in this book. I think a lot of them will end up being important, but they don’t feel that way right now. They just feel like names given to people so they can be called something other than the doctor or the beggar or the pilot.
The book did a great job at keeping me interested and curious, but it lacked in being able to pull any emotions. For example, a character named Cat is meant to play this big role and does have a large impact on Hadrian and the book. She isn’t in the book the whole time, but her part has its lasting effects. Hadrian thinks about her at least twice a day. However, her part is also meant to be one that leaves the reader sad and feel for Hadrian’s loss. Unfortunately, I just didn’t. I didn’t feel anything. Her part felt like it happened so quickly that I didn’t have the time or the means to grow attached to her or Hadrian’s feelings for her. The plot felt much the same. We spend the whole book watching this obnoxious kid waste years of his life awkwardly lumbering from one predicament to the next – but it is somehow compulsively readable. The super interesting part of the book, which is the conflict with the Cielsin, doesn’t even come into focus until close to the very end, and yet it’s that end of the book that had me hooked and made this go from an average read to a slightly above average read that holds a promise of being something phenomenal.
The writing style Ruocchio has is pretty great for this book. It didn’t help lend a hand to the lack of emotions while reading, but it definitely packed a punch for many of the conversation pieces within the book. I loved getting a glimpse into the philosophical aspect of it and found those portions of the writing to be some of my favorites. Ruocchio is constantly dropping lines such as “It is a mistake to believe we must know a thing to be influenced by it. It is mistake to believe it must even be real” or “My memory is to the world as a drawing is t o a photograph. Imperfect. More perfect. We remember what we must, what we choose to, because it is more beautiful and real than the truth.” Such simple, yet wonderful way of getting a point across.
The world in this book is where the writing shines. It feels lived in. It feels like it could be real and continues to move even when the character isn’t there. Hadrian talks about how his mother and father aren’t close and his mother prefers the company of women. First, we love representation in this household. Second, this would be a huge bummer for most couples. But no worries in this world. If you have enough money and the right family name, you just have your fetus grown in a lab – no need of going against your preferences. It gives the sterile, cold feeling to aspects of life that aren’t usually so cold and uncaring. It’s so interesting to see Hadrian as he gets these small inklings that, despite judging others for being inhuman, he isn’t that close to human, either. He was made rather than grown and lives hundreds of years compared to our life spans now. Yet, that genetic code isn’t accessible to everyone – it’s a benefit of wealth and power. The Cielsin are so interesting and I feel like there’s going to be so much more depth to them and the accent civilization that is discovered. The world and science-y feeling of it is what made this book for me. That and seeing Hadrian wonder about in a clueless daze, yet always trying his best. His best just isn’t that good and he’s so dramatic it makes me both sick and giggle. Bless his little dumb heart.
I would love to know your thoughts on this book. I would recommend it to readers who enjoy a slow burn and don’t mind characters who make dumb decisions. There are clear inspirations from Dune, so I think readers of that could enjoy this as well, but it’s important to note that I haven’t read Dune myself. However, from what I’ve overheard, the inspirations are clear and easy to spot, but that does not mean it’s the same thing. Empire of Silence, though heavily influenced, does appear to still be its own thing. I have been told the series only gets better from here, so I’m excited to see how Hadrian and the story evolves. We know he becomes the man who killed a sun – I’m excited to see how the whiny kid from this book becomes that man who is both heralded as a hero and despised as a killer. Should I continue on to the next one? I think I’m going to read the shorter one set between books one and two, then I’ll reevaluate if this is a series I’m going to continue. Definitely let me know if you think I should!
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When The Prey Becomes the Predator: The Perfect Victim by David Sodergren
Information:
- Goodreads: 3.96 out of 594 Ratings
- Age Range: Adult
- Genre: Horror, Thriller
- Series: None
Summary:
Katy Ketcher has been dubbed the ‘perfect’ victim. She’s young, which means she’s easily manageable. Her dad, the second biggest producer in Hollywood, is filthy rich, meaning he will pay whatever the kidnappers’ little hears desire in order to get his precious girl back. She even walks home from school all on her lonesome. Easy to catch. Easy to keep. Easy peasy payday. That’s exactly what Bax, Corvo, Emma, and Varg all think. And that’s exactly what they do. But there’s a few things wrong: first, they did not expect to have to snatch her best friend, Jill. They did not expect Varg’s pedophilic and murderous tendencies to make their goal nearly impossible. And they did not expect Katy to be an unhinged girl dead-set on revenge. What do you do when the girl who was supposed to be easy money cares more about killing you than she does about being saved?
As per usual, look into the trigger warnings, such as talk of rape of a minor (I swear, he gets what’s coming for that one), murder, gore, body horror
Review
This book is so good. It’s short and sweet; I don’t typically like shorter stories. But this format tends to work for me for survival horror. You’re immediately thrown into the action, with Bax, Corvo, and Emma taking Jill and Katy. You don’t get time to breathe. It’s just go, go, go in the best way. The book is full on plot driven, as I don’t personally think there’s enough time or space for it to be mostly character driven. Luckily, the plot is so great and fun and interesting that it keeps the reader invested all the way through and prose only adds to this. Sodergren does not have beautiful writing. His writing doesn’t slow down. It’s as quick and ready to sprint as the plot is.
The characters are all horrible people. Bax is an egotistical wannabe in a constant power struggle with everyone else in the group except Corvo. He started off not wanting anyone to die or get hurt, yet consciously hired someone who he knew was a pedophilic asshole and had a thing for torture. Not really a great guy to have in your team when your whole plan revolves around this girl making it back to her dad in one piece. Emma knows Bax wants to sleep with her and uses that to her advantage. She, too, has a thing for killing people and doesn’t really care about Katy in the slightest. Varg is disgusting. Corvo is a giant and also an idiot. He’s the sweeter of the bunch, without really wanting the girls to get hurt. But he also isn’t really gonna stand up for them. Jill and Katy are the stereotypical rich 16 year olds. Commenting on one another’s bodies (long neck and fat ass) instead of focusing solely on surviving. But, this just add to how fun the book is. Sodergren’s way of writing men makes seeing them be slaughtered feel so rewarding. I swear, I have not read a single man this guy wrote be an actual good guy. Sodergren gets it. But that doesn’t mean the girls are great either. They’re rude. They’re annoying. They are often very angry before the killing even starts. And yet, you root for them the entire time.
The way Katy becomes more fixated on revenge than on her own rescue and safety is so interesting and fun to watch. She slowly begins to simply not give a shit. Yeah, she does want to make it out alive. But that’s an added bonus of her plan of killing every single one of the people who took her and hurt her. Starting with Varg. And his death scene was one of my favorites. Though, I can’t gloss over the scene where one of the men’s literal balls falls out. The gore is great. The book kept me invested all the way through. It was interesting, it was intense, and it was fun. In such a strange way, I find a lot of Sodergen’s books weirdly nostalgic. They remind of me the horror/slashers of the early 2000’s that I watched as a kid (we don’t have to question why I was watching them so young, leave me alone). I’ve loved and enjoyed every single one.
Have you read David Sodergren yet? If horror is your thing, I think he’s definitely worth giving a shot and I’d love to know what you think as you go!
